My Random Thoughts

Noisy Faith

Reema — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 20:31:34 +0000

There are several ways and mediums of expressing the faith in the Almighty. Temples are also one of these mediums. Several events are organized at temples for mass expression of faith. Such a religious event – Satsang – was held at the temple near my home for ten days. The organizers of this satsang were utilizing the power of loudspeaker to the maximum. The session timings were 8 am to 2 pm and 5 pm to 10 pm. Though the timings were within the norms, the decibel level of the loudspeaker was not. The norms say :-

II. Loudspeakers

1. The noise level at the boundary of the public place, where loudspeaker or public address system or any other noise source is being used shall not exceed 10 dB(A) above the ambient noise standards for the area or 75 dB(A) whichever is lower.

2. No one shall beat a drum or tom-tom or blow a trumpet or beat or sound any instrument or use any sound amplifier at night between 10. 00 p.m. and 6.a.m.) except in public emergencies.

3. The peripheral noise level of privately owned sound system shall not exceed by more than 5 dB(A) than the ambient air quality standard specified for the area in which it is used, at the boundary of the private place.

Now I am not an atheist but I am not a very religious person either. And above all I believe in live and let live. I don’t force anyone to agree with my beliefs and practices and I expect the same from others. So being made to listen to bhajans (hymns) at a volume level where I am unable to hear even the voices in my head [ using just an expression don't worry ] doesn’t go down too well with me. I feel the whole point of offering prayers and singing bhajans goes to waste that way because all the Hindu gods must have stuffed cotton wool in their ears. I believe the most sincere prayers and praise are not the ones that are spoken out loudly. Maybe holding satsang sessions has some benefit but my point is that if I wanted to listen then I would have gone to the temple!! I guess same goes for other people living in the neighborhood. By putting up blaring loudspeakers and having absolutely bad singers (you have to hear it to believe how bad can one sing!) who sing bhajans to the tunes of Hindi film songs like “Mere angne me tumhara kya kaam hai” (I recorded it. To listen download from here) ; you are making people like me feel pain and anger rather than invoking any religious sentiments. In fact my mom started to have anxiety and palpitations due to the loud noise.

Decibel levels of common sounds

dB

Environmental Condition

0

Threshold of hearing

10

Rustle of leaves

20

Broadcasting studio

30

Bedroom at night

40

Library

50

Quiet office

60

Conversational speech (at 1m)

70

Average radio

74

Light traffic noise

90

Subway train

100

Symphony orchestra

110

Rock band

120

Aircraft takeoff

146

Threshold of pain

The most direct harmful effect of excessive noise is physical damage to the ear and the temporary or permanent hearing loss often called a ‘temporary threshold shift’ (TIS). In Maharashtra, people living in close vicinity of Ganesh mandals that play blaring music for ten days of the Ganesh festival are usually known to suffer from this phenomenon. Noise can also cause emotional or psychological effects such as irritability, anxiety and stress. Lack of concentration and mental fatigue are significant health effects of noise. It has been observed that the performance of school children is poor in comprehension tasks when schools are situated in busy areas of a city and suffer from noise pollution.

I wanted to go and protest but my mother stopped me citing the reason “we have to live in the neighborhood”. Earlier religious songs used to be played from 6 am till evening at that temple. When my dad protested, the priest and other people present there behaved as if he had committed a great sin by asking them to not play songs loudly. I really fail to understand what sort of worship is this? But yes, the next time this happens I am not going to sit quietly and suffer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now something unrelated to the topic yet somehow related. Nita had written a post on Hindutva and I had commented “Right now I am feeling not so happy at being a Hindu. The temple near my home has organized some satsang since one week and rest I will express on my next post at my blog.”

A blogger misconstrued my comment as some Hindu Muslim thing and wrote on his blog :- “some of my friends are ashamed of being a Hindu just because a temple near their place is having a Sat Sang Session and is chanting prayers/bhajans from loudspeaker .. They think that it’s a noise pollution .. But the same bunch feels very holy and pious when Muslims offer their Namaz five times a day – everyday on loud speakers in every mosque all over India stating that ‘There is no GOD except Allah!!”

The blogger gave me the logic that as a blogger he has freedom of speech and that – “in your comment on Nita’s post, u only mentioned about Mandir .. U never spoke anything against mosque which use loud speakers every day .. that’s the reason I wrote that thing .. It was just my perception and not an allegation”

There can be more people who misconstrue my post too as something I have written against Hinduism and Hindus and may label me with the new term they have coined – “pseudosecularist”. So I want to make few things clear about my comment and my post.

1. I did not write I am “ashamed”. You can go and check what I had written in my comment. I had written I am not happy..and not happy because when I want to protest then people with ideologies like the blogger try to show this logic and make me feel as if its wrong to protest against anything remotely related to Hinduism if one wants to be called a true Hindu.

2. I don’t appreciate any sort of loudspeaker use be it on temple or mosque. I dont support loudspeaker..thats it..nothing to do with Hindu or Muslim.

3. If you are pointing at me then why and how can you say “they have no objection to namaz five times a day etc etc etc” without even knowing my opinion on loudspeakers on mosques? How can you say I feel very holy and pious listening to namaz?? Freedom of speech is ok but that doesn’t mean one can go writing or saying or concluding anything about someone without knowing their beliefs. And due to the same freedom of speech I am clearing my stand in my post.

4. I only mentioned Mandir in my comment on Nita’s post because firstly I was being bugged by loudspeakers on a temple not a mosque incidentally and secondly I don’t have a mosque near my home.

5. Please stop seeing everything through the glasses covered with colors of Hindu- Muslim issues, “pseudosecularism” and stop “perceiving” slightest remark against anything related to Hinduism as “anti Hindu pro Muslim”.

6. If I have to support everything that is done in the name of Hindu religion (in this case having loud irritating satsang sessions) to prove myself to be a true Hindu and not call a spade a spade (in this case noise pollution), then I am better off not being a Hindu. So there.

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I Am The Original Humorist

Reema — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 18:43:49 +0000

The IndiBlogger of the Month is awarded to a blogger who churns out great content, has a loyal fan base and who’s dedication is an inspiration to all IndiBloggers.

I WON!! I WON!! I WON!!

I am the IndiBlogger of the Month May 2009 – Original Humor.

There were 74 nominations and it was a close competition between me and the Solitary Writer. I won by 2 votes!!

I am the Original Humorist – its official!!

Thank you all my dear readers who voted for me. Thank you my dear Twitter friends for bearing my incessant campaigning and for not unfollowing me Thank you to everyone who voted for me and wished me good luck!! Thank you Indiblogger team for such an opportunity!

Lately my blogging spirit and frequency has gone to dogs but now I am totally charged up to write a good my style post soon!!

From all the prizes Indiblogger has for the winner, I have chosen the Flickr Pro account for 2 years. Why? Because recently I have become interested in exploring the world of photos and photography. I reactivated my Flickr account and have been regularly posting my photos there. A Flickr Pro account would be a blessing!! In fact it was this lucrative prize that made me campaign for myself.

If you are there on Flickr, here is my photostream. Would like to add you to my contacts!

Due to my new found love for photography, I have started a new photo blog too along with my sister as a co-author. It is called “The Pixelated Life“.

Hamar bitiya bhi bloggers ki seva aur unko entertain karne ke liye blogosphere me apne kadam rakh chuki hai. Aap sab readers log usko bhi hamar blog “My Random Thoughts” jaise pyar kare, apna aashirwaad de aur iss safar me uska saath de jaise ab tak humko dete aaye hain. Dhanyawaad beheno and unke bhaiyon.

~ Aapki sevika Reemawati

Posted in Blogging, HUMOUR Tagged: Awards, Blogging, Cartoons, Flickr, Humor, Indiblogger, Original Humor

Vote for Me at Indiblogger

Reema — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 18:48:20 +0000

Remember my post “Classification of Students” where I classified students of a class in some categories based on my teaching experience?

All of you had a good laugh and remembered your college days, didn’t you?

Remember my post “Road Rash in Real Life” where I wrote about the specimens I encounter daily on roads ?

All of you had a good laugh again, right?

Remember my post “Viva voce Experiences and Anecdotes” where I shared some observations and anecdotes about viva voce exams of engineering students?

That was insightful and funny, right?

Remember my post “Mother and Blogging” where I narrated the incident of my mother wondering whether there was a suitable guy among my blog readers?

That was hilarious!

And lastly remember my post “The Other Side of Bench” where I shared some thoughts for all students out there from the teacher side of the bench..few things that students think teachers don’t know?

All of you found that funny too, eh?

Now why am I reminding you of my attempts of “Original Humor”? (ORIGINAL is the keyword!)

Because Indiblogger – the largest network of Indian bloggers has accepted my nomination for IndiBlogger of the Month May 2009 – Original Humor. And these are the posts that I had submitted in my nomination.

Voting has begun and will remain open only for 5 days.

So all Indiblogger forum members please log into your Indiblogger account and go to http://www.indiblogger.in/nominations.php?id=3

Locate me and my blog “MY RANDOM THOUGHTS” and vote for me! Your support is much needed and appreciated! Thank you!

If you don’t have an Indiblogger account, then you have to register yourself.

Click here and register yourself right now and enjoy the following benefits!

Get your blog ranked and win awards
Discover great blogs by Indians
Attend or organize IndiBlogger meets
Get your blog reviewed and discuss blogging

Cast your vote for IndiBlogger of the Month May 2009 – Original Humor ..that is ME!

Posted in Blogging Tagged: Awards, Blogging, Indiblogger

Summer Vacation Trip Part 3

Reema — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 18:09:00 +0000

This is the final post in my Summer Vacation Trip series. Click on the collages for enlarged view.

10th June 2009 :- Checked out of hotel at Pune early morning as our Volvo bus to Mahabaleshwar was to depart at 7.00 am. Bus left at 8.00 am!! A closed ac bus and Ghat road didn’t do any good to me due to my motion sickness problem. I think hired cars are better for people like us. As soon as we reached and got off the bus, I was well.

Checked into pre-booked rooms of the MTDC holiday resort. I had inquired at 16 hotels including this one for their rates and MTDC resort was the cheapest one which had a restaurant too. After seeing the place I was satisfied with my choice. Awesome surroundings with a small playground, nice rooms and good room service with wonderful food. There are a lot of monkeys there and can create a lot of ruckus. And bookings are tough to get here especially during the tourist season. This is MTDC resort.

11th June 2009 :- After a lot of rest on the previous day, we went sightseeing. There are several “points”, temples and a lake (Venna lake) to see in Mahabaleshwar. Thankfully it didn’t rain and we were able to see lots of places. Venna lake is enjoyable more in the evening due to the crowd [good looking I must add and all the stalls including video games parlors!]but the boat rides are very costly! The place where Marjorie point, Arthur’s seat etc are there requires a fit body and a pair of good legs. I was amazed at so many old people climbing so many steps! And of course the place was full of honeymooning couples.

There were a lot of horses too but I didn’t have the courage to ride them. Dad and I paid Rs 10 each to just sit on a horse and take photos We ate strawberries too but didn’t like the taste. And there is a nice market place too! Overall, its a very romantic place..the woods, the clouds, the lake…a place where love stories happen.

12th June 2009 :- We left for Panchgani early morning . There are not many sights to see in Panchgani. To increase the business of the taangas (which charge 300 rs for a 10 min ride around the table land) vehicles don’t go into the tableland whereas its perfectly accessible. And if you can walk, you can traverse the whole area on foot. One can see many gliders para sailing in Panchgani. There is a picture of one in the collage. I have only 5x Optical zoom

There was a place where the Pandavas had lived while on exile. Seriously why on earth would anyone climb so high to live during exile? Then we went to Mala’s farm and bought a lot of jams of different flavors. I found a strange figurine etched on a tree trunk there. Then we had snacks and wonderful ice cream at Mapro farm. After lunch and rest at MTDC resort, we went to Venna lake in the evening. The weather with clouds and slight drizzle was awesome! It can get quite cold in Mahabaleshwar so its better to have warm clothes with oneself.

13th June 2009 :- Though our bus for Pune was to depart at 11.30 am, we had to checkout at 9.00 am from the resort as per their rule. We just waited at the hotel which was the pick up point for those going to Pune. The bus journey downhill was worse than uphill and especially when I had the first seat. It felt as if I am falling down. Many people got sick and I was glad to see I wasn’t alone After sometime someone shouted from the back of the bus “Stop the bus! Everyone get down soon. Something is burning!” We all got down hurriedly. The fan belt had burnt out. The driver took the bus to a nearby restaurant and called for a replacement bus. It took 3 hrs and those 3 hrs was full of heat and sweat. We all missed Mahabaleshwar and we were facing the harsh reality of weather in June in India. We reached Pune totally exhausted.

14th June 2009 :- Some more shopping in Laxmi road market in Pune and loads of rest and sleep.

15th June 2009 :- Headed back home.

Thus ended my wonderful summer vacation trip!! Looking forward to next vacation

Earlier Posts

Summer Vacation Trip Part 1

Summer Vacation Trip Part 2

Posted in Photos, TOURISM, Vacation Tagged: Collage, India, Mahabaleshwar, MTDC, Panchgani, Photos, Tourist Places, Travel

Summer Vacation Trip Part 2

Reema — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 19:27:33 +0000

So the day we arrived in Pune that is 7th June 2009 was a rest day for everyone except me. I had my first blogger’s meet that day which I described in my earlier post.

8th June 2009 :- We hired a vehicle to take us to Khandala and Lonavala and back. The driver turned out to be a mobile phone addict!! Thank god we had a safe trip. We stopped at a little restaurant “Shiv Sagar” just outside Aundh. The food was tasty and reasonably priced. Thats the place, our hired car, my parents and my sister’s MIL.

After filling our stomachs we moved on. The Pune – Mumbai Expressway was beautiful and the long tunnel awesome!

As it hadn’t started raining yet, all the waterfalls and greenery were dry in Khandala and Lonavala. So we didn’t get to enjoy much in the hot sun. We found Lonavala to be better than Khandala though. It sure was windy in Lonavala as you can see my new hairstyle. We bought the famous Lonavala Chikki and came back to Pune by evening.

9th June 2009 :- Again we hired a vehicle from the same guy to take us around Pune. And ended up with the same driver. First of all we went to Aga Khan Palace in Pune. It was a wonderful place with such green surroundings and peaceful atmosphere.

The Aga Khan Palace Pune is a national monument of India’s freedom movement. Following the launch of Quit India movement in 1942, Gandhiji, his wife Kasturba, his secretary Mahadevbhai Desai were interned at the palace from August 9, 1942 to May 6, 1944. Mahadevbhai and Kasturba passed away while in captivity at the Agakhan palace and their samadhis are located in the campus.Situated near the River Mula, the palace is a simple memorial to Gandhi and his life. The famous movie ‘Gandhi’ was shot here.

Then we went onto see Pataleshwar Caves and the adjoining Shri Jangli Maharaj Mandir. Maybe be Nita or Suda will be able to shed light on the question – who was he? I don’t know I was surprised to find so many office goers ( from their attire and bags) lounging around with newspaper or some book in that mandir and caves area on a late weekday morning.

From there we went to visit Shaniwarvada, a palace fort built by the Peshwas.

Then we went to see the Raja Dinkar Kelkar Museum. It was awesome but camera was charged at Rs 150 extra!! It was too much! But yes it is indeed a place to take snaps. Such wonderful artifacts. Maybe I will take photos when I go to Pune next time. From there we went to Nivant Garden Restaurant on Paud Road. There were three sections at that place – one ac section full of agarbatti smoke, one hot garden considering there was no wind and one inside with very less fans. We were all sweaty by the time we finished eating. I won’t recommend the place in summer. The chilly chicken dish in Pune restaurants (I saw in 2 of them) is quite different from other places. It is served as long slices!

After lunch we skipped a few places and went to Khadakwasla Dam which didn’t turn out to be much enjoyable at afternoon.

Then we came to back to hotel. On way the driver stopped the vehicle and went to attend some personal work. He was gone for around 45 mins! Atleast this time he didn’t play bad songs like he had done on our Khandala trip.

Posted in Photos, TOURISM, Vacation Tagged: Aga Khan, Collage, India, Khadakwasla, Khandala, Lonavala, Mahatma Gandhi, Pataleshwar caves, Photos, Pune, Raja Dinkar Kelkar Museum, Tourist Places, Travel

First Bloggers’ Meet and Special Day

Reema — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 18:39:53 +0000

Actually this is a part of my Summer Vacation series but as it needed a special mention I didn’t title the post as Part 2.

7th June 2009 :- Arrived in Pune and after a lot of hotel search, checked into one. It had wonderful surroundings..peaceful and green. And the hotel rooms were good too.

Sudarshan or Suda’s blog was one of the first few blogs I started reading when I made my debut in blogosphere. He was also one of the persons who motivated me to move to WordPress from Blogger. In fact I had moved to WordPress on this very day one year ago. Over this past year Suda and I have become close friends. It was essential for my survival that I meet him if I was ever in Pune. So on 7th evening I had my first ever blogger’s meet at KFC at Gold Adlabs multiplex in Kalyani Nagar Pune.

It didn’t feel like I was meeting a stranger. Suda made the sweet gesture of greeting me with my favorite flower ( I don’t know its name..the one with long stem and petals) and that too of pink color. The moment he laid eyes on my camera, he started fiddling with it. I found him to be shy and not that much talkative as he is on phone. And he said I sounded better on phone. Grrrr Overall a nice bloggers meet. After all he got a chance of meeting a world famous blogger!:D This is me and Suda.

Now for the special day part.

Today is my Birthday

Go on and wish me!! I love getting birthday wishes and presents too

This is me over the years :-

Posted in ABOUT ME, Blogging, Friends & Colleagues Tagged: Birthday, Bloggers Meet, Collage, Friends, Personal, Photos, Pune, Suda

Summer Vacation Trip Part 1

Reema — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 15:50:55 +0000

Hello my readers and fellow bloggers. I am back from my 12 day trip. And such a long trip deserves more than one post This is the part 1 of the series of posts. As I had 4 senior citizens with me, I had made this long schedule with plenty of rest days thrown in and it proved to be successful.

5th June 2009 :- Hometown to Manmad. Had to get off at 3.30 am! Train to Aurangabad (2 hrs journey) was at 5 am. Though it started from Manmad itself, it came and left at 7.30 am. It was a passenger train and that meant seat for the quickest Thankfully we got seats. Both Manmad and Aurangabad stations are lacking in coolies (porters). Checked in a hotel at Aurangabad and went sightseeing in evening. Hotel experience was not good due to power cuts and bad food. But the evening was well spent at Bibi ka Maqbara and Panchakki (water mill). I realized that photography is very difficult in India as people don’t move out of frame even on request!!

The Bibi-Ka-Maqbara is a beautiful mausoleum of Dilras Banu Begum, the wife of the Mughal Emperor Aurangazeb, constructed by her son Prince Azam Shah. The mausoleum was intended to rival the Taj Mahal, but, the decline in architecture and proportions of the structure had resulted in a poor copy of the latter.

6th June 2009 :- Checked out of hotel at Aurangabad and left for Ellora Caves (30 kms from Aurangabad) in a hired car. We stopped at Daulatabad fort on way to Ellora but didn’t have the energy to climb it.

There I found guava sellers coloring their guavas to decorate their baskets. They too had a sense of color and style!! I took a snap with a seller’s permission.

Then we went to see Aurangzeb’s Tomb. It was a simple building and the tomb was nothing special. Apparently Aurangzeb lead a very modest lifestyle.

: Aurangzeb’s tomb

Then we reached Ellora. We were awestruck to see the monumental caves and sculptures made by cutting the rocks and faces of the hills. Ellora, a World Heritage Site, is something that needs to be seen to be believed. The most famous cave of Ellora was the Kailash Temple. Such intricate and difficult work after cutting a hill is unthinkable.

Ellora represents the epitome of Indian rock-cut architecture. The 34 “caves” – actually structures excavated out of the vertical face of the Charanandri hills – being Buddhist, Hindu and Jain cave temples and monasteries, were built between the 5th century and 10th century. The 12 Buddhist (caves 1–12), 17 Hindu (caves 13–29) and 5 Jain caves (caves 30–34), built in proximity, demonstrate the religious harmony prevalent during this period of Indian history.

Click on the collage for an enlarged and clearer view.

Ellora has a lot of shops and restaurants nearby. My Bong readers must be aware of Feluda. The Kailash hotel and Ellora reminded me of the Feluda movie “Kailasher Kelankari”. After a nice lunch we visited the Ghrishneshwar Temple that enshrines one of the 12 jyotirlingas dedicated to Shiva.

After this we headed to Manmad to catch our night train to Pune.

Posted in India, Photos, TOURISM, Vacation Tagged: Aurangabad, Aurangzeb, Bibi ka Maqbara, Daulatabad, Ellora caves, India, Kailash Temple, Manmad, mausoleum, Panchakki, Photos, Tourist Places, Travel

Random News

Reema — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 18:10:55 +0000

# The issue that I faced with my blog hits when I hit the 100,000 mark has been resolved. I was being lazy in writing a mail to WordPress support but as soon as I did, the problem was corrected. So that was my first experience with WP support and I am happy.

# My post “Machismo and Crying” had an opinion poll in it. I had asked Do You Think Guys Who Cry Are Sissy? Do You Think Guys Should Not Cry? Here are the results :-

Total 41 votes. 29 people i.e. 70% said No. 8 people i.e. 20% said Yes. 4 people i.e. 10% said I don’t know.

Prateek has again written a post in reply to mine. You can read his post by clicking here. I guess we just have a huge difference of opinions and I have decided not to stretch the topic anymore. But debates are good. Makes blog posts interesting and popular

# Saw “Night At The Museum: The Battle of Smithsonian” from the Internet. Too much talking and “verbal” attempt at humor rather than action. Seldom funny though. Kind of boring actually. Hank Azaria is good. Ben Stiller the same.

# I had made a list of the things I had to do in this summer vacation but I am nowhere near doing them after 18 days. Sigh!

# But I did complete one task on that list. I did spring cleaning or rather summer cleaning of my room. Now my wardrobe has lots of space and needs to filled up with new clothes Shopping!! Yeyy!!

# And the last news is that I am going on yet another blogging break for 2 weeks. My parents, my sister’s in-laws and I are going on a trip to Ellora Caves, Pune, Khandala, Mahabaleshwar and Panchgani.

I will be Twittering whenever I can and whenever BSNL GPRS allows me

Adios amigos! I will be back soon to read your wonderful posts and leave my lovely comments

My previous travel posts :-

Vishakhapatnam

Puri

Posted in HUMOUR Tagged: Blogging, Calvin and Hobbes, Cartoons, Summer vacation, Travel, Vacation

Five Female Crushes

Reema — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 07:06:21 +0000

Have you ever thought what would it be like if you belonged to the other sex..the one you are not in this life? In this tag, I have been asked to write the 5 crushes I would have if I were a guy. Do I have to think like a guy for that? Oh my god! So here goes :-

1. Courtney Cox :- I like her mainly because of her character (Monica) in F.R.I.E.N.D.S….I relate to her OCD very much! And I like her eyes very much. She was originally offered the role of Rachel but she preferred Monica. She holds a brown belt in karate.

But do you want to know how she looks without makeup? Here is a photo I found on Internet.

2. Julia Roberts :- She needs no introduction. With a face and a perfect smile like that..she is absolutely adorable! Apparently she is a huge fan of actress Aishwarya Rai, whom she once commented on being “The most beautiful woman in the world, more beautiful than any Hollywood actress”.

And she is a natural beauty! This is her photo without make up.

3. Nicole Kidman :- That redhead woman is hot!! (Talking like a guy as the tag requires) And I simply love her nose and eyes. A very tall woman at nearly 5′ 11″, she actually stood about 4 inches taller than ex-husband Tom Cruise, and rarely wore heels when seen publicly with him so that they could appear similar in height. Since their divorce, she is rarely seen on the red carpet without high heels, and she often meets 6′ 4″ actors in the eye.

I found a photo of her without make up but I don’t think that’s her. Is it?

Here is another one of Nicole Kidman without make up.

Now if I forget acting skills and just concentrate on looks like some guys do, here are the next two women who would be my crushes.

4. Aishwarya Rai :- I admit she is really beautiful but…let us leave it at that. And no I didnt find her acting in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam or Guru or Jodhaa Akbar or any other movie any better.

And thats her without make up.

5. Katrina Kaif :- Again a very beautiful lady but…Apparently she was the most searched Indian celebrity on Google in 2008.

I could not find her photo without make up. People have put up some snaps claiming she is without make up but I find that she is wearing light make up.

Anyone wishing to do the tag is most welcome!

All the trivia from IMDB.

Posted in TAGGED Tagged: Actresses, Aishwarya Rai, Courtney Cox, Crush, Julia Roberts, Katrina Kaif, Nicole Kidman, Tags

Machismo and Crying

Reema — Thu, 28 May 2009 21:24:36 +0000

Recently, I had a discussion on crying with Prateek and he declared that guys who cry are not sensitive but sissy. And he even wrote a blog post “Guys don’t cry” to explain his stand. In his post he has cited 5 reasons why guys should not cry in the form of 5 situations. Like a guy should not cry for love or when someone dies etc etc. Anyway, as I strongly disagree to this conservative/orthodox belief, I decided to express my views and ask readers & visitors their opinions. There is an opinion poll at the end of the post. Do participate!

Three types of tears are generated by the human eye. Basal tears protect the eye and keep it moist. Reflex tears flush out the eye when it becomes irritated. And emotional tears flow in response to sadness, distress, or physical pain.

Apparently Ancient Greek mourners used to catch their tears in vials and bury them with their loved ones to show the extent of the sorrow for their deaths. Even till 18th century, men were revered for their sensitivity and would cry openly in public places, especially at the opera. But somehow down the line, a societal and parental conditioning that “Don’t behave like a girl. Don’t cry. Real men don’t cry” became more powerful and till date remains so.

Studies have shown that emotional tears contain more manganese, an element that affects temperament, and more prolactin, a hormone that regulates milk production.

Before puberty, boys and girls cry the same amount, but by age 18, women cry substantially more. That is because females develop substantial amounts of prolactin, which is thought to cause weepiness. Maybe Sakhi or Nomad can shed more light on this. My point is that the association of crying with girlishness or shall I say the weaker sex and therefore weakness is absolutely wrong.

Every guy hears “real men don’t cry” either from family or friends and so they learn not to while growing up. But those who, inspite of knowing this “taboo” and knowing that their peers may ridicule them, are not afraid to express their grief or sadness; are worth appreciation and according to me have more Emotional Intelligence. I feel they can connect better with their other halves and probably understand women better than their counterparts who are just hard rocks emotionally. Ability to express emotions also shows sensitivity at some level and the modern woman likes her man not to be all gruff and stoic type!

Sobbing out manganese and prolactin is thought to relieve tension by balancing the body’s stress levels and eliminating build ups of the chemicals, making the crier feel better.

A guy can be heart broken or he can feel sad/shocked when insulted (for example Sreesanth in the infamous slap case) or his world may be devastated when his mom/dad/sibling/wife dies. Repressing emotions due to some bogus belief does no good. Crying helps to cope with any form of loss far better. I think its better to express one’s emotions. My Dad had cried when my grandmother died several years ago. But that didn’t stop him from fulfilling all rites and didn’t make him “sissy”. And even if a guy loses control in any emotional situation instead of being all “strong and responsible” as expected, I think it is ok! He is just human! Give the guy a break!

All this is my (a girl’s) perception of the issue. For a balanced view, I asked some guys on my Google Talk friend list about their opinion on the question ” Do you think guys who cry are sissy?” and here is what they said :-

Anshul :- No. guys who are sissy usually do not cry. they are just good at gaining sympathy from girls…there was this saying losers are good at attracting women, thats how they get away with being losers. Laughing(happiness) and Crying both are emotional, one +ve and -ve. So one can do both without any reason…like people go into laughing fit. they can also go into crying fit.Irrespective of guy or gal, humans do all this shit.+ lot of stuff depends on your own nature in person…

Suda :- No.

Sandeep :- hmm.. depends on the situation and depends on in front of whom he cries. I mean, I don’t think he’s sissy if he cries in front of someone he has strong emotional relationship…otherwise yes maybe.

Varun :- Nope.

Here are a few more excerpts from various articles :-

The most likely reason we produce emotional tears is because it’s a means of communication. Before babies can speak, they can cry. The only way for infants to express frustration, pain, fear, or need is to cry. Adults may use crying to bond with other humans. Expressing sadness can prompt comfort and support from peers. Different languages can provide barriers to spoken communication, but emotions are universal. There are also culturally acceptable reasons for crying that bring people together, such as at funerals or weddings. So weeping after that sappy movie might not mean that you are a total wuss after all. In fact, it may mean that you are behaving like a perfectly normal human being.

In fact, tears are increasingly cool, scientifically and politically.

Only a generation ago, Ed Muskie blew his 1972 presidential hopes by shedding a tear about a critical news report on his wife. Less than a decade ago, Colorado Congresswoman Pat Schroeder got endless grief for crying when she quit her presidential run in 1987. Yet today, both Bill Clinton and Bob Dole seem so comfortable blubbering in public — dare one say “on cue?” — that the Wall Street Journal dubbed this campaign the “weepiest on record,” with only iron-man Ross Perot eschewing the snivels.

So tell me guys and girls – Do You Think Guys Who Cry Are Sissy? Do You Think Guys Should Not Cry?

Results will be declared in next post. On a lighter note, here is a video where Chandler says he can’t cry and Joey declares him to be dead inside.

dB		Environmental Condition
0		Threshold of hearing
10		Rustle of leaves
20		Broadcasting studio
30		Bedroom at night
40		Library
50		Quiet office
60		Conversational speech (at 1m)
70		Average radio
74		Light traffic noise
90		Subway train
100		Symphony orchestra
110		Rock band
120		Aircraft takeoff
146		Threshold of pain