One Way or Two Way

I believe serious blogging comprises of four important things :

# Presentation – Writing good quality posts (whatever type one write about) regularly at one’s blog and being active.

# Communication – Actually reading subscribed blogs’ posts and commenting on them (and not just writing anything for comment’s sake..just to mark your presence).

# Reciprocation – Replying to comments on one’s posts.

# Networking – Checking out regular commentators’ blogs or new blogs..you know like friends of friend and possibly subscribing to those thus extending your network and acquiring long-term blogging relationships.

I have been a bad blogger…very bad in fact. I have ignored both the presentation and reciprocation part for some months now :( And reasons are many…lack of time NOT being one of them though. But I think I can now safely say that the blogging spirit has rekindled in me and I am back in business :) Yet again. :P

As for the communication part, I put in a lot of effort in reading and commenting. Every time I have returned from a blogging break, I have tried to cover as many unread posts on each blog I have subscribed. (2-3 are remaining..will catch up soon) I guess I don’t need to do that but it is just something of a quirk I have. I feel I may have missed out on something important happening in my blogger-friends’ lives. (Did receive few shocks this time…One had deleted her blog..started a new one but private, another one has made her blog private). Also I feel I am being a disloyal reader-blogger friend if I just mark “all read” and start reading/commenting afresh. So, anyway, I don’t know how many appreciate my effort or just think I have loads of free time so I do that. Trust me I do have other things to do with my time. :|

Some people (bloggers) call blogging as a “I scratch your back, you scratch mine” world. But of course!! What did you expect? That you would just keep on posting and others would come and comment and expect nothing in return?? That can only happen if you are some very famous blogger. But in normal cases and that is like 90% of the blogosphere, it IS a two-way street! And if you consider blogging a serious activity, you got to put in the effort. After my honest effort, I will expect some response in return. That is human nature and those who deny it are just lying. But there are many who don’t reciprocate. I have 234 subscribers in Google Reader, 1800+ subscribers in email and I am a faithful reader of 120+ blogs (not counting the many blogs which are dormant now). And yet such low response!! Such numbers make me think my blog subscribers (except the ones who do comment be it regularly or irregularly) are in some alternate universe!! :D

Has the blogosphere become a very selfish place now? :( Does a blogger’s absence for some time erase their earlier efforts from others’ minds? Are blogging mutual relations so fickle..so ephemeral? :( Is there no concern towards well-being for when the blogger and reader are not connected on any other social media platform? Do a dormant blog’s readers feel actually relieved thinking “phew! that is one blog I don’t have to mark my presence now”? Am I being the last standing fool? Yet I remain faithful to the blogs I have read since I came in this world. But then that’s just me..bit crazy and someone who takes blogging quite seriously..not just a pastime. But then how long can a one-sided relationship go on? And it should not too! Sigh!! :( Am I just being too needy?

Towards fulfillment of the networking part and to bring some much-needed change in my Reader, I have started following some new blogs..namely A Quest on Overdrive, Catawampus me!!, R’s Mom, Somkritya, Saddi Delhi, Expressions, Perceptions, Life’s Many Whispers, Clouds on My Palette, Meera’s Musings, On a Wing and a Prayer, The Era I lived in, Deviant Wave, Crafty Shines (had heard a lot and seen her around a lot in our common blogging circle..it was about time I followed her!), Mindspace, UmasReflectionsFloral Fragrance, The Conjecture Girl, Searching Self, Life is beautiful, Gyanban, PrecariousnessRoddurer Protisruti, Blogging All The Way, Double Inverted Commas and Unspoken Heart. Blog on people!! Hope to have a great blogging experience with all of you! :)

Lastly, I feel no matter how many social media platforms come and go, be it Facebook, Twitter or more recently Pinterest, no “like” or “RT” or whatever they do over at Pinterest; can give that happiness and excitement as when you publish a post on your blog and the first comment notification email comes in your inbox. And if they keep coming, that’s just heavenly! :D

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30 thoughts on “One Way or Two Way

  1. ‘no “like” or “RT” or whatever they do over at Pinterest; can give that happiness and excitement as when you publish a post on your blog and the first comment notification email comes in your inbox. And if they keep coming, that’s just heavenly! :D’ – Absolutely, Reema! That is extra special, and feels wonderful – every time :)

    Welcome back!

  2. How true. Everytime I go on blog break and come back, I make sure I read atleast 2 or 3 posts from every blogger in my roll. That’s jet me. But there are some souls who just never attempt to even look at your blog as if their’s a great piece and my blog is nothing but shit. But over years I’ve manage to accep that as reality thinking mine is not a great blog and why would someone waste their time reading my crap. It’s a hard lesson learnt and I don’t want anyone to think of ‘me’ that way.. So I always comment- not just leave 1 for the sake- a proper comment wherever possible…Great post.. With a bang!! Welcome back…

  3. Welcome back…and hopefully this time, without too many long breaks! :) You have been very good though in commenting on other blogs when you return…I still remember a couple of times when I suddenly had heaps of comments on older posts from you! :) I agree that blogging is a two-way street but at the same time, due to time restraints, I find it hard to follow all the bloggers that follow me. Plus there may be bloggers following me who blog about topics that don’t really interest me in which case I find it hard to genuinely comment! I am going to check out some of the bloggers you mentioned…already read a few of them but there are others who sound interesting. Happy blogging Reema!

  4. I guess Blogging evolves as the journey progresses. I am enjoying every bit of it now, and my blog is quite different from the mostly-stories blog it used to be. I used to hate traveling, but now I love to go to new places and put up an account of those places in my blog. I am surprised at how fast tastes/interests change (at least for me).

    Its not wrong to expect people to reciprocate a favor. I do it always. But these days I am not so excited about comments like how I used to be in the initial days. I make sure that I leave quality comments that add to the discussion.

    Destination Infinity

  5. Hi Reema, thanks for landing on my blog and reading my crazy ruminations :)
    I appreciate your efforts in regularly following and commenting on so many blogs. Kudos!
    But I’m afraid you are going to label me a ‘selfish’ blogger. I hardly read about 7 blogs and regularly comment on 4 of them. I know there is lot of talent out there in the blogging world and many interesting things to read, but I find it too overwhelming to read many blogs.

  6. It’s an eternal debate isn’t it? Should I comment only on posts I like or should I be polite and reciprocate?

    But that’s how we survive – we are needy for comments, we love interacting with readers and wonder if they really like my posts, or are they just being polite?

  7. Reema, I understand what you are saying as I am sailing in the same boat. I returned after 2 years when most of my blogging buddies were dormant or have left for good. But, life is not the same. I really do not have the time or inclination to search for new friends and start reading and commenting on loads of blog to gain my previous status (and I know it’s not difficult). But prioroties change, I guess. :)
    Sometimes, you just write for the love of it. Just because you feel like penning your thoughts in a readable format. Comments do matter but don’t depend too much of them. Success and capability do not always go hand in hand.
    I also believe that over the period of time your blogging buddies will also go through transilitions and their priorities will change. At that point, you have to make new friends to survive. That’s the way it is.

  8. Welcome back! :D
    You’re one of the bloggers I’ve known right from the time I started blogging…one of the bloggers I read with with ALL my concentration (you sometimes write on such serious stuff, I swear!), the oNLY one I’m scared of :D :D and one of those that are always a delight to have back! :)

    So again, welcome!!

    There are times when I comment in earnest, other times when I read through fully, but have no value to add through comments/energy left to comment — but i honestly like the post. At such times, I “Like” the post. And I guess I must be the only one who writes to bloggers on their email ids requesting them to add “Name/URL” in the comments section, so I can post my wonderful comments :D :D Recently, I went to this blog where a dear blogger posted just a line saying “I’m frozen…I don;t know what to do.” and a run away mouse actually wen and clicked on ‘Like’. Yikes. I wanted to die then. Of course, I mailed her with an apology and all…but whatever!

    Honestly, comments do not matter to me much. I write just because I want to (which is probably also why I take my breaks whenever I want to and come back shamelessly like I was never away :D)…and of course, if a comment comes in, I’m happy…but I don’t really miss them if they don’t come.

  9. A post from you .. and I read all the comments you have made at my place too ..

    I think it slowly picks up as you blog, slowly you build a network. If you are genuine and read others and comment on those posts as what you feel on the post , then people whose blogs you have commented will come and read you for sure.
    pressing the like button is good , but personally i would prefer is someone read the post nad wrote what they thought , if they thought it was a bad note then they TELL, for thats how one learns .. write one work .. WOW, nice , this or that doesnot help anyone , to me it feels they are passing time thats all..

    I love comments and I am VERY GREEDY :)
    I totally agree with you that some beleive its “I scratch your back, you scratch mine” although I dont beleive in it , I go regularly to a few blogs who have NEVER commented on my blogs , maybe my notes are not that good, and I see them commenting on notes of people who have jsut put a picture that too copied from google, It hurts but then it doesnot bother me .. I hop around as i learn a lot from everyone ..

    subscribers I got so many but the amount of hits and comments dont match up so again it shows how that works :)

    hey dont let it dampen your spirit , write as much and I am sure you will find me stalking you he he he he:) take care

  10. Hola! I realize that am one of those bloggers who do not do any of those things. Rather do it very sporadically.. but I used to do all of those things.
    And I am one of those blog subscribers who read everything silently and never comment unless I have something to say.

    Hopefully I’d change that this year :)

    And thanks for stopping by what is almost a dying blog :)

  11. Welcome back!!! And thank you so much for considering my blog to be mentioned up there :)
    For me… blogging is a different world altogether …with a set of virtual friends who are unconditionally there for you. Very loyal & a big support system!! Their comments/remarks simply make my day :)

    Networking, statistics etc I do not know..I just read my friends who I like, who share common interests, who inspire and discuss things worthwhile… :)

  12. I am new to blogosphere world after recently re-discovering my passion for reading. Stumbled upon your blog immediately after reading some enticing writing. The problem with my part of reciprocation is that I use FEEDLY, a reader which is lot more convenient and effective than GR. The reader makes me indolent and impassive to your selfless contribution. But now , after reading your post I’ve decided not to allow such inadmissible action to occur. From now on I am going to visit the site i read and comment/debate on every post I read.

  13. I am one of those blog readers who read your blog on reader..and somehow the user experience is not such that it is easy to comment, much easier to read and move on…excuses…excuses…

  14. welcome back!!

    I totally love how you come back and comment on all the posts you have missed! :)
    That’s something I try to do, but sometimes fail if I’ve taken a really long break!
    I love the whole process – the writing, reading, commenting and replying to comments! :)

  15. I am still trying to digest the fact that u have decided to follow me!! :)
    For me blogging started in search of myself and now it is carried on because I enjoy it. I comment when I really want to say something and not because I have to. Otherwise there is the like button if I Like some post :)
    Blog on!!

  16. Yesterday when I checked my mail and saw 22 unread mails under my blog folder notification I knew that you are back :D

    Needless to say good to see you back. Blogging has changed over last few months, the old magic & enthusisam is missing. I seriously salute you for having the patience to come & comment in each post, I always chicken out not that I don’t read the posts that I had missed but it is just that I do not comment in them, my bad!
    Blogging needs commitment but for some ppl it is TP :) and it takes a lot tom ake your blog work but then for some ppl it is a place of outlet of emotions!

  17. Hi,

    Thanks for linking :)
    Thanks again for that much needed reminder – I need to kick off laziness and do more of the Communication & Networking bits.
    Will be back to check out the new blogs you’ve linked to.

  18. Hi, I received a pingback notification in my inbox and was curious to know who has started following my blog at a time when I have been so irregular! I couldn’t wait till morning and accessed it on my phone. :) I must tell you that I only comment when I am compelled to; never to mark presence or scratch a back. I personally feel it not to be proper blogging etiquett. Thank you for dropping by my space and hope you like it. I will explore yours soon.

  19. “I scratch your back, you scratch mine world”.
    i liked it. it’s really true. And i agree to u too that, it’s natural and it is a way for beginners. For some, posting in the blog and getting no comments for it brings the dull faces including me too. In some corner of our heart there will be some hope waiting ‘today i will get a comment’. (funny but it’s true).
    i believe analyzing the problem is more important. you have analyzed it,am sure you will over come your problem Reema:)

  20. Girlfriend,
    I’ve came to your blog a million times and there weren’t any new post, until recently. Now, if you’ve been hiatus far way too long, that can also equate that you are ignoring your readers. I don’t feel it that way, but there might be others who failed to see why there should be a need for them to regularly update their readers in the hopes there’s a new content from you or from anyone who have been hiatus for a while. I’ve gone through the same phase and I know its painful.

    I am here, no matter what :D

  21. Absolutely Reema!!! Comments on blogs make my day too :-) And I used to be a good blogger a year or so ago, but as per your criteria I fail quite miserably when it comes to networking and reciprocation!! Its just because blogging takes up so much time, it is addictive!

  22. Thanks for the follow. As ironical as it might sound,having a low need for approval alwys helps improve your blogging experience.Never be under pressure to post – the moment there is pressure the quality gets hit.So if there is a less need to be “followed” one can concentrate on quality rather than quantity. I have managed to do that, inspite an acute shortage on time I maintain two blogs and its no sweat at all. I genuinely read posts of bloggers I follow,and comment as and when I can.

    Getting 50 comments for a post should not be the goal,writing what you believe in comes first, and in the bargain if the post gets 50 comments then so be it ! Likewise I wont be dissapointed if there only 5 comments as responses simply because the number of comments per post is not necessarily an indicator of good writing.

    So in a nutshell, enjoy what you write and write when you can,without worrying about anything else.

  23. I guess I am too late to comment on this. But anyways I will do it :P. First of all thanks for started following me. I love the last lines of your post. the thing which bring smiles on your face is the first comment on your post rather than a like or RT.
    I also feel sometimes it’s too difficult to keep things one way in real life too while keeping high expectations from others. It’s a give and take relation always whether it’s a real or virtual world I would say.
    I always feel like not to comment on the most popular blogs as those bloggers highly appreciate a new reader but here I felt something different. But one suggestion: try to reply to the comments of the readers. ;)

    Keep blogging :) . Once again thanks for following.

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